Practical-eschatology: Difference between revisions
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==Transcript== | ==Transcript== | ||
{{ | {{computertranscript}} | ||
:[Describe panel here] | |||
:Over time it became harder and harder to find military recruits | |||
:Everyone expects killing to become automated within 20 years so it's not a good long-term plan for young people. | |||
:00 | |||
:Leaders were forced to consider people formerly deemed unfit. | |||
:What if we went to philosophy departments? | |||
:\ | |||
:We need practical people. | |||
:Hear me out. They can convince themselves anything is okay. | |||
:The unusual enrollees created entirely new types of complaint | |||
:How come I'm being sent to the front? I'm an atheist. When I die, I either get de-existed or I go to hell dave over here believes he gets bonus points in heaven if he dies defending us. Send him! | |||
:The armies of the world organized around "eschatological fairness. | |||
:Perkins! Did you say you believe that if you get killed in the line of duty you go to valhalla where you feel up norse maidens and drink mead from a goat's teats all day? | |||
:Sir, yes, sir! | |||
:Get your cave-diving gear and a stick of dynamite, son. | |||
:The people with the most naively hopeful views of the hereafter were rapidly eliminated | |||
:Tell my wife. We'll meet again one day... in the land of weed and threesomes beyond this vale of tears.. | |||
:Meanwhile. The people with the darkest view of this universe were promoted | |||
:Franklin, you believe this life is hell number 1 and when you die you sink to lower depths of horrors more terrible than the last in an infinitely nested sequence of unspeakable misery? | |||
:Sir, yes, sir! | |||
:We'll put you | |||
:In management. | |||
:In order to keep up recruitment, military leaders founded their own religion | |||
:Follow us and you will go to the land of weed and threesomes beyond this vale of tears. | |||
:Woooh! | |||
:But once they had power. The temptation to believe their own theology became overwhelming | |||
:Maybe I could be jesus only a new kind of jesus who just tells people exactly what they want to hear all the time and in return gets sex and money and power over life and death | |||
:Fortunately, technology saved the day at the last minute | |||
:Franklin! Sorry. But the autonomous kill-bots came earlier than expected. You'll have to be christ incarnate on civilian time | |||
:Shucks! | |||
:snap! or | |||
:Caption: smbc-comics.com | |||
==Votey Transcript== | ==Votey Transcript== | ||
{{ | {{computertranscript}} | ||
:[Describe panel here] | |||
:As soon as people realize I'm jesus christ we're gonna come kick your ass! | |||
:? | |||
{{comic discussion}} | {{comic discussion}} | ||
Latest revision as of 13:49, 11 February 2024
| practical-eschatology |
 Title text: I wonder when the first cult run by a robot will start up. |
Votey[edit]
Explanation[edit]
|
This explanation is either missing or incomplete. |
Transcript[edit]
|
This transcript was generated by a bot: The text was scraped using AWS's Textract, which may have errors. Complete transcripts describe what happens in each panel — here are some good examples to get you started (1) (2). |
- [Describe panel here]
- Over time it became harder and harder to find military recruits
- Everyone expects killing to become automated within 20 years so it's not a good long-term plan for young people.
- 00
- Leaders were forced to consider people formerly deemed unfit.
- What if we went to philosophy departments?
- \
- We need practical people.
- Hear me out. They can convince themselves anything is okay.
- The unusual enrollees created entirely new types of complaint
- How come I'm being sent to the front? I'm an atheist. When I die, I either get de-existed or I go to hell dave over here believes he gets bonus points in heaven if he dies defending us. Send him!
- The armies of the world organized around "eschatological fairness.
- Perkins! Did you say you believe that if you get killed in the line of duty you go to valhalla where you feel up norse maidens and drink mead from a goat's teats all day?
- Sir, yes, sir!
- Get your cave-diving gear and a stick of dynamite, son.
- The people with the most naively hopeful views of the hereafter were rapidly eliminated
- Tell my wife. We'll meet again one day... in the land of weed and threesomes beyond this vale of tears..
- Meanwhile. The people with the darkest view of this universe were promoted
- Franklin, you believe this life is hell number 1 and when you die you sink to lower depths of horrors more terrible than the last in an infinitely nested sequence of unspeakable misery?
- Sir, yes, sir!
- We'll put you
- In management.
- In order to keep up recruitment, military leaders founded their own religion
- Follow us and you will go to the land of weed and threesomes beyond this vale of tears.
- Woooh!
- But once they had power. The temptation to believe their own theology became overwhelming
- Maybe I could be jesus only a new kind of jesus who just tells people exactly what they want to hear all the time and in return gets sex and money and power over life and death
- Fortunately, technology saved the day at the last minute
- Franklin! Sorry. But the autonomous kill-bots came earlier than expected. You'll have to be christ incarnate on civilian time
- Shucks!
- snap! or
- Caption: smbc-comics.com
Votey Transcript[edit]
|
|
This transcript was generated by a bot: The text was scraped using AWS's Textract, which may have errors. Complete transcripts describe what happens in each panel — here are some good examples to get you started (1) (2). |
- [Describe panel here]
- As soon as people realize I'm jesus christ we're gonna come kick your ass!
- ?
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